Six Years and Running.........

January used to be a really tough time for me.  I don't have many times of the year that are as eerie as January.  I have been pretty fortunate for being my age and not having many major deaths or accidents in my life.  I really can't complain.  Typically, on January 14 I get really depressed.  But this year I woke up being happy.  This is the first time in six years that I am able to say that on this day.  For six years my life has changed dramatically.  This morning I woke up and picked up my daughter when she woke up.  The mornings are the best with her.  Especially when she wakes up.  She is really cuddly and needy.  She just holds on and lays on your shoulder.  This I am thankful for.  Because of her I forgot about what happened on this day six years ago.  But without that moment, I wouldn't have Avery, I wouldn't have my family, I wouldn't be as healthy I am, or anything else I am or have today.  

Six years ago sucked.  Not only did I get hit by a car, I also lost a close family friend and also lost my relationship to my father who was my best friend.  It doesn't matter how many years it has been but those three moments defined who I am.  They made me stronger.  They made me have the balls to move 700 miles away from my hometown, my family, and friends.  They made me become a man, an adult, and change things in my life that I had control over.  These moments made me remember how fragile life is and to not take it for granted.  I was lucky.  The doctors told me any other way that car would of hit me would of been devastating for me.  Just think, I wasn't even suppose to be outside for it, my tiny little coworker was.  But I am thankful that somehow I was lucky.  

I remember waking up the next day not knowing what my life was going to be like.  I couldn't even get out of bed.  I had to use a cane to walk for a few months.  I was miserable.  But I think without these three moments, I wouldn't of taken a job in North Carolina.  I wouldn't be where I am today without these moments.  Three years ago, I would probably be drinking my sadness away.  Instead, this morning I held my daughter and reminded myself how lucky I am.  This evening I am going to go on a run to remind myself that I am lucky I can still walk let alone go on a run.

My knee and hip still ache in the winter.  My mind still remembers the sound of my head crashing against the hood.  My feet still remember the coldness of the puddle of water at 6 degrees outside.  But those are just reminders that I am alive.  

To those two women who called 911.  Thank you.  

January 14, 2009 doesn't define my life.  It started a new chapter.  

I don't know where I will be from a year from now but I know I will be moving forward.