Hey Steve, You've Lost Too Much Weight

For the past few months people keep asking me, "How much more weight are you going to lose?".  I say, "I don't know, my body keeps losing it so why not keep working on it".  Medically I am officially not extreme obese or just obese, I am actually in the category of just being "overweight".  Which is funny to me because I have been in that category for 33 years.  It's funny how people respond to your weight loss.  Some people are jealous and act out, some people think you have lost too much weight, some people think that you are crazy.  Very few know what it is like to obese your whole life.  Very few people understand the struggles of losing weight, keeping it off.  Some people don't understand my new life style.  Some people don't understand what eating clean is.  

For all the doubters and talkers, here is why I have lost weight and keep it up until I know I am an a healthy position.  Yes, I do enjoy running.  Yes, I do enjoy my healthier lifestyle.  But I am doing this for very few selfish reasons.  For myself to live longer and healthier.  I am also doing this for my family.  I want to be able to be a good dad and husband.  

Last week I met with my Family Doctor to discuss my weight loss and where I should go.  We picked my next goal weight to be 200 pounds.  Its scary and exciting all in one.  But the best part was looking at my blood work.  She was super excited how good my blood work came back.  This is why I decided to lose weight.  Since I have been with our doctor, I have only had two tests done.  One after six months of Weight Watchers and one December 30.  My one in April I know was a great improvement from one before I lost weight but the newest test reminds you why you need to work out and eat healthy.  This is what motivates me.  It motivates me to not have to take blood pressure medicine, water pills or any other crap that I would need or have taken already in my life as a 30 something.  Instead I am healthy by eating right and working out.

This is what motivates me on my runs.  To get healthier for my kids and family. I love surprising my doctors.  

Six Years and Running.........

January used to be a really tough time for me.  I don't have many times of the year that are as eerie as January.  I have been pretty fortunate for being my age and not having many major deaths or accidents in my life.  I really can't complain.  Typically, on January 14 I get really depressed.  But this year I woke up being happy.  This is the first time in six years that I am able to say that on this day.  For six years my life has changed dramatically.  This morning I woke up and picked up my daughter when she woke up.  The mornings are the best with her.  Especially when she wakes up.  She is really cuddly and needy.  She just holds on and lays on your shoulder.  This I am thankful for.  Because of her I forgot about what happened on this day six years ago.  But without that moment, I wouldn't have Avery, I wouldn't have my family, I wouldn't be as healthy I am, or anything else I am or have today.  

Six years ago sucked.  Not only did I get hit by a car, I also lost a close family friend and also lost my relationship to my father who was my best friend.  It doesn't matter how many years it has been but those three moments defined who I am.  They made me stronger.  They made me have the balls to move 700 miles away from my hometown, my family, and friends.  They made me become a man, an adult, and change things in my life that I had control over.  These moments made me remember how fragile life is and to not take it for granted.  I was lucky.  The doctors told me any other way that car would of hit me would of been devastating for me.  Just think, I wasn't even suppose to be outside for it, my tiny little coworker was.  But I am thankful that somehow I was lucky.  

I remember waking up the next day not knowing what my life was going to be like.  I couldn't even get out of bed.  I had to use a cane to walk for a few months.  I was miserable.  But I think without these three moments, I wouldn't of taken a job in North Carolina.  I wouldn't be where I am today without these moments.  Three years ago, I would probably be drinking my sadness away.  Instead, this morning I held my daughter and reminded myself how lucky I am.  This evening I am going to go on a run to remind myself that I am lucky I can still walk let alone go on a run.

My knee and hip still ache in the winter.  My mind still remembers the sound of my head crashing against the hood.  My feet still remember the coldness of the puddle of water at 6 degrees outside.  But those are just reminders that I am alive.  

To those two women who called 911.  Thank you.  

January 14, 2009 doesn't define my life.  It started a new chapter.  

I don't know where I will be from a year from now but I know I will be moving forward. 

What A Year Will Do

It has been a very busy past month.  It feels like last week when I left for Pennsylvania to go hunting.  Since then our family has been very busy.  But the holidays are long and gone and now it is time for the "tax season" of New Year Resolutions.  As an avid user and attendee of Weight Watchers now and a 2nd year runner, I know this is the time when everybody gets up and decides to make a new year's goal.  I jokingly told my wife that mine was to stay married.  She didn't think it was that funny.  I didn't really have a New Year's Resolution Per Say thing year but I did sign up for the Detroit Free Press Marathon in October.  I only did it on New Years Day because it was half off.  I decided before I finished my half that if my body liked me, I would run the Free Press as my first Marathon.  It is my hometown and my dad ran it.  Where else could I run in Canada, an international bridge, international tunnel, Comerica Park (Home of the Detroit Tigers), Ford Field (Home of the Detroit Lions), Belle Isle Park and many other great places.

But this wasn't my New Year's Resolution.  Instead I wanted to talk about how happy I am right now.  Looking back at 2014 is just amazing.  Some great things have happened.  The first and foremost is my lovely daughter, Avery, who was born on May 8.  She has brightened up our house and has reminded me why I am so thankful I married my wife and I decided to make a lifestyle change.

2014 was the first year in my life where I decided to be healthy.  During the year, I went from 287 pounds to 219 pounds.  A lost of 68 pounds.  Since I started, I have lost over 110 pounds.  It is crazy to think I went from this to where I am at.

In 2015, I am not only a healthier person but also a happier person.  Its excited to see the changes.  One of the biggest changes is jumping in the deep in and helping the J & A Shamrock Training Team.  Which has been a ton of fun so far on Saturdays.  It is exciting to see all the people coming out to run and enjoy each others energy.  It feels great to be a Pacer.   Not only do I have someone to run with, I also have someone to listen to me talk.

It is only 3 days into this year and I am really excited for the rest.  I can't wait for the journey.

Happy New Year.

#SURFNSANTA2014

So Saturday was my first Christmas run ever.  It was a ton of fun and I got to run through the Christmas lights at the ocean front.  I am a huge fan of them and I love Christmas, so it was a bonus.  +Lori and Avery came with me for this race.  That was exciting because they haven't seen me race since my half.  It was also nice because it finished inside at the Convention Center.  I had a solid goal time of breaking the 9 minute average barrier.  I didn't do it but that was alright.  It was a tough start due to the amount of people in each Corral.  But I still had fun and killed my PR time.  I ran my fastest 5 mile run ever.  I ran a 9:07 pace.  I was really happy with that.

As I was thinking about my times,. I decided to look back at my times and I was blown away by how much I have taken off my times.  I ran my first race in March at the Shamrock, ran another 8k in June, and this race this weekend.  So here is my breakdown of my running paces this year.

March: Shamrock 8k - 12:18
June: CHKD 8k - 11:38
October: Anthem 10k - 9: 51
November: Turkey Trot - 9:04
December: Surf N Santa 5 Miler - 9:07

I can't believe I have taken off over 3 minutes off my average race.  I guess that is what happens when you get in shape and lose over 100 pounds.  As always, J & A does a great job and the after party was fun.

I look forward to the race next year.

Merry Christmas everyone.

When the Cold Wind Blows..........Stay Inside.

I remember in Michigan never being cold.  Not ever.  I used to laugh at people down here all bundled up when it is 40 degrees out.  Now I am that person.  Mostly because I have lost over 100 pounds and I don't have that hibernation warmth.  But I am always cold.  I am cold when I run.  I am cold when I go outside to my car.  It's funny because when you are really fat, you become accustomed to being fat and warm.  I haven't been this weight, really, ever in my adult life.  Dang, I even asked for a fancy wind proof, rain proof jacket.  I never even owned one in Michigan.  Not even my double husky fancy $160 North Face fleece can't even defend me from the cold crisp air of the mid Atlantic.  It's terrible.  I always have to have gloves on too.  And in my office, last winter I made fun of all my coworkers being cold.  But at the end of the day, I would rather be cold or wearing really baggy clothes.

This is just one of the prime examples of new feelings in my life.  Another one was this past weekend at a holiday party.  I was a bit overwhelmed with all the flattering remarks from the people who haven't seen me in a long time.  I also needed to go out and buy a nice casual dress shirt for functions because I literally have no clothes left in that department.  Most the new clothes I have are either for exercise or work.  No social event clothes.  But again, it makes me feel good.

You know, there is no code, book, idea, or story anyone can tell you when you lose weight.  No one ever told me how much it would change me emotionally and physically.  No one ever told me how people would react.  No one ever told me I would hear a bunch of naysayers.  It's funny when you hear people say, "you have lost too much weight".  Like really, I am still clinically obese.  My doctor will tell me that.  Any medical professional would.  As I struggled two weeks ago about what I should do at Weight Watchers I reminded myself of why I am doing what I do.  My doctor had written me a note that I can be at lifetime weight at 230 pounds (which I have already surpassed).  After kind of getting the cold shoulder from my coordinator, I went home and thought long and hard.  I decided that I am not at my lifetime weight.  No way of cheating.  I haven't weighed in since I last weighed in but I know I am still going to lose pretty easily.  So I need to regroup, meet with my doctor and figure out a good goal weight.  I am scared to have to maintain.  I am also scared of not having a low enough goal weight.  But I want something that I can accomplish.  And MAINTAIN.  I am probably going to go with 210.  I need to meet with my doctor but I think that would be a good weight.  My dad was always around that weight.

Another funny story is when I went shopping Monday before my movie. I sent a picture to my wife with a top I found.  It was sweet.  But it wasn't something I would normally wear.
It was a large.  Which blew me away too.  But I liked it.  Last night i am talking to my wife and she says, "That's not something I have ever seen you wear".  I was like, "I know, that's because I was never able to fit into normal size clothes and they never sell cool things for fatties."  I learned this week that a positive of being thinner is being able to buy clothes that are more fashionable or hip.  use whatever you want to call it.  But it felt great.

Everyday I struggle with my new identity.  I know people around me do to.  But it is here to stay.

This shirt is pimp

Maintenance

For a long time.  My dream weight loss goal was 100 pounds.  It was crazy to think I would even get here.  I didn't expect to actually hit it.  I guess I was just not ready to handle it.  And I am not.  I have been pretty stressed out since I hit the 100 pound mark.  This past weekend I had a conversation with my Weight Watchers leader and we talked about maintenance.  Quite frankly, it scares me.  I have never been in a place in my life where i just need to maintain.  Either I need to lose weight or, oh, wait, that's all I have ever needed to do.

I am scared if I don't lose, I will gain.  I am also scared that I will just gain it all back.  It's just new territory.  I have never been here.  I also don't know where I need to go.  Should I go lower?  How much lower?  It is hard because so many people think I have lost too much weight.  Which annoys me.  It's not the thing you want to hear when you worked so hard at losing weight.

Overall though, I am happy I am here and I know what it took.

VB Turkey Trot 10k Recap

So I finally got home from hunting camp.  I didn't shoot anything.  But I can say that i am very happy with my weight loss.  It made hunting and all the hard work so much easier.  Anyways,  I ran the Turkey Trot 10k in Virginia Beach.  it went really well.  Actually my fastest time ever.  It definitely doesn't have the tradition and feeling of the Turkey Trot in Detroit, but it will have to suffice for the rest of my life.  I ran fantastic.  It was my fastest pace ever.  I ran a 56:20.  Which is faster than the last 8k I did.  I also ran past a coworker of mine.  He was pretty surprised that i passed him.

I am just proud of how much faster I have been and how much healthier I have been.  I am looking forward to my 2015 goals.